I had a set of two cute little plastic squirrels (supposedly they look "realistic") who sit in the tulip bed at the base of my front yard flagpole. They came as a set. One crouches, looking cute, and the other sits on his hind legs, also looking cute.
The crouching squirrel is missing.
I can't imagine a burgler sneaking into my front yard by dark of night, and making off with one squirrel.
So, then, what happened to the crouching squirrel?
I have an idea--I think it's been kidnapped, no squirrel-napped. Carried off in the night, squirrel-napped by a band of wild squirrels and taken prisoner. I think if we conducted a search, we might find it tucked away in the hollow of a tree, wondering why the heck someone hasn't put out an Amber Alert for Squirrels on it's behalf. Or wondering how much ranson (in the form of walnuts) has been requested for it's return to the front yard tulip bed. It wonders why the sitting squirrel hasn't hired detectives to find it. Poor thing. I hope it's squirrel-nappers are kind to it.
I would like to make a public plea to the squirrel-nappers to return the crouching squirrel to the tuplip bed. I will NOT negotiate with terrorists. There are no walnuts here, I am a poor working midwife. Please, return the crouching squirrel to it's home.
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Perhaps the squirrels are trying to deprogram the poor slob. They assumed you had trapped two of their poor innocent brethren and forced them, somehow, to remain stationary and "look cute" for your amusement.
I imagine "Squirrel X" is now in heavy de-programming.
I would also not be surprised if there is another daring commando raid to rescue the remaining "slave squirrel."
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