Cats

I have a splitting headache tonight, right behind my left eye. I think I am brewing a migraine, which I have maybe once a year. I have no idea why. I have really had a fairly nice day--had a nice baby this a.m., big girl. Fairly calm afternoon at work.
I am cat-sitting for Dr. Z while she is in WDC. Her cats ( and don't get me wrong, I LOVE cats) are just a little neurotic. There's Clyde, the house cat--referred to as such since he has the run of the house, and Clara, the bathroom cat, since she lives exclusively in the upstairs bathroom. Clara used to live in the upstairs bedroom, but has taken to potty-ing on the bed, so now she lives in the bathroom... Clyde upchucked a hairball on the hardwood floor, which I had the wonderful opportunity to scrub up this afternoon, and Clara pooped on the bathroom rug, which I didn't see, and managed to step in. Gee, I love cat sitting. She is coming back on Friday. I still have that smell of Cat-poo on my shoes, so they are sitting in the garage. The dogs are giving them the once over.
I am really looking forward to having the famous and lovely Cinamon (Eunice and Erik's cat) come to live with us. I hope she learns to love everyone in the house. I really miss having a cat. NO MORE OUTDOOR cats however--Mom are you listening??? I think she got the point even more after I told her what happened to Jodi's cat--someone used him for target practice, and hit him with a load of buck shot, broke his leg in 3 places. Poor baby. Jodi was SO upset, of course, who wouldn't be.

Well, I am going to take some excedrin migraine and drink a coke. Maybe that will help.

More dining delights

I worked 36 hours straight. Got up Thursday a.m., worked all day, all night and all day Friday. Came home. Exhausted. Dinner: Leftover Pizza from at least 2 months ago, frozen, re-heated until burnt and crispy, along with 2 hot dog buns, which had been buttered and sprinkled with garlic salt. Also burnt, black.
Just shoot me now.

Not to worry my dearest fabulous fiance/daughter-in-law

I read your blog. I have answers to your questions. No, the grandma will not be upset if you do not let her wash your clothes. She will be relieved she doesn't have to do it. She will happily relinquish some of her kitchen duties, and shopping duties. She will love getting out and doing something fun, like a hobby or class. She is pretty housebound with only me here, since my job eats me alive.
Now, repeat after me,
Everything is going to be all right.
Everything IS going to be all right.
Everything is GOING to be all right.
Everything is going to be ALL RIGHT!!
Really, it is.
I can hardly wait for you to get here. We have more girly fun together!!!
LOVE YOU!!!

Continuing Menu Items

Thank God I go out to lunch. I had a GREAT lunch with Jodi and Pam and Jim today. Because when I got home, this is what greeted me:

Knackwurst (I don't even know how to spell it, why would I eat it?) Some form of mystery meat, which, unfortunately got a little close to the fire, and was burnt on both sides. No amount of mustard made it edible.
Water-logged, overdone Brocolli, cheese sprinkles and vanilla pudding, made with sugar-free mix and skim milk.
OK, why does anyone even BUY vanilla pudding? If it isn't chocolate, why even bother? Then, mix it with skim milk, which I strongly suspect was outdated, as I KNOW for a fact I have not picked up a quart for at least 2 weeks.
I can't stand this any more.
And then, when I asked what the mystery meat was (NO, I didn't put it that way, I was polite), she burst into tears.
I am going to jump off a bridge. I can't stand this much longer.
Someone HELP!!!
Where are my car keys??? I'm going to McDonalds.

Tonight's Menu

Salad. Very sad romaine lettuce.
Pork chop, hockey puck style. How can anyone consistently turn pork chops into hockey pucks?
Asparagus, approx. 1/3 in. chunks, muushy.
Someone kill me.
Oh, wait, that's what's happening now....

What sportscar are you?

http://tomorrowland.us/sportscar/

Porche 911. Wow, who'd have thought????

Tonight's Menu

Cherry tomatoes, 6, with 1 tsp. blue cheese dressing, for dipping.
1 petrified pork chop
Chopped asparagus, boiled beyond recognition.

That's all.

Yes, that's all.

I'm going to Culver's.

Ha HA HA

Try this one--if George gets stuck, you can move him with the cursor.

http://www.planetdan.net/pics/misc/georgie.htm

One of the Squirrels is Missing

I had a set of two cute little plastic squirrels (supposedly they look "realistic") who sit in the tulip bed at the base of my front yard flagpole. They came as a set. One crouches, looking cute, and the other sits on his hind legs, also looking cute.

The crouching squirrel is missing.

I can't imagine a burgler sneaking into my front yard by dark of night, and making off with one squirrel.

So, then, what happened to the crouching squirrel?

I have an idea--I think it's been kidnapped, no squirrel-napped. Carried off in the night, squirrel-napped by a band of wild squirrels and taken prisoner. I think if we conducted a search, we might find it tucked away in the hollow of a tree, wondering why the heck someone hasn't put out an Amber Alert for Squirrels on it's behalf. Or wondering how much ranson (in the form of walnuts) has been requested for it's return to the front yard tulip bed. It wonders why the sitting squirrel hasn't hired detectives to find it. Poor thing. I hope it's squirrel-nappers are kind to it.

I would like to make a public plea to the squirrel-nappers to return the crouching squirrel to the tuplip bed. I will NOT negotiate with terrorists. There are no walnuts here, I am a poor working midwife. Please, return the crouching squirrel to it's home.

Dining at Home

I really love my mother. I hope to be half as nice as her when I grow up, if I am, I will be a truly nice person. But if I ever start to cook like her, I want my children to put me out of their misery. Thank God I go out to lunch every day and get one decent meal.
I have regaled my kids with some of the treats I have been tortured with. Black bean chili with no meat or tomato sauce. Chicken with sauerkraut. God help me.
Today, we had very wilted lettuce with shriveled up tomatoes, these poor, pitiful pork chops that had been virtually burnt to a crisp (I picked one up and whacked the plate with it, like a hockey puck) and these absolutely horrible broccoli bits, that had been boiled past recognition and topped with watery cheese.
Then it was followed up with baked apples. Too chewy to eat, sour and topped with reduced calorie whipped cream. MMMM.
Where are the take out menus? Is there any pizza delivery out there????
HHHHHEEEEEELLLLLLPPPPPPPP!!!!!!!

There are very few things that infuriate me as much as

a liar. I really, really, really hate liars. We have this viscious little witch at work, who is in serious need of firing, who is going from person to person planting seeds of disention and lies. I CANNOT tolerate people like this.
I was sitting at the nurse's station yesterday, when a friend from work called me and told me about this, and I must have responded to this a little more loudly than I thought, because I sort of exploded and said something like "that viscious litte viper" and the nurses all stopped what they were doing and LOOKED at me. They just aren't used to me showing any sort of anger or temper.

Well, it was honest feeling and I was mad.

I will personally choke that girl if I catch her doing that sort of thing. Don't piss off the Mammahead.

Ok, it's how I really feel....

http://www.softlab.ece.ntua.gr/~sivann/pub/swf/may02-smilepop-soapbox4.swf

What Kind of Squirrel are YOU?

Visit www.cheekysquirrel.net/squirrelname/

Success in Computer

O Frabjous Day! I have successfully installed more memory in my computer!! And I didn't even have to call Ethan or Erik to get it done!!!
Of course, I have NO IDEA what I did, I just followed the diagram......
:)

Ahh, the Wonder of the Computer

Well, I finally got frustrated with the slow performance of my computer. I ordered some more memory, but thinking I'd be a smarty pants and save a few bucks, I ordered it from a warehouse, not from Gateway. Hmmm, bad mistake.
It was delivered last week, and I finally screwed up my courage and removed the back of my computer box, with the telephone support of one of my computer-wise sons. It really was pretty easy to install, just plug and go. Alas, it seems to be the wrong one. Now, mind you I ordered the exact model number recommended by Gateway, but the service technician, whom I had to call, informs me that it is NOT the right one. So, now my great cheap memory is costing me twice as much as it should have in the first place.
Boy, do I feel stupid.

Students and Teachers

I come from a long line of teachers. My grandmother taught school in a one-room schoolhouse on the Nebraska prairie. I have cousins who are teachers, friends who are teachers. Really, my life is full of all sorts of teachers. Even my daughter is a teacher. I have been a teacher, too.

When I first went into nursing, I was pleased to realize there was a lot of teaching in the profession of nursing. I have taught fellow nurses, patients and classes full of expectant parents. I have taught paramedics, community classes and grade school kids. When I finished my degree as a family nurse practitioner, I became part of the University of Kansas Graduate School staff, and spent 4 1/2 years teaching NP students and med students. I really, for the most part, enjoyed it.

So, as I sit here tonight, waiting for another baby, I feel sort of guilty. I have a midwifery student right now, and I didn't call her for this delivery. Well, the deal is, she doesn't know this patient, and I really don't want her here. She hasn't even met the girl, and the student wants to end her call shift at midnight. This patient is going to deliver, but it is going to be after midnight. And I just don't have the energy tonight. It is really hard to have midwifery students. It took me what felt like forever to adjust to Jayme last summer, but I finally did. And I really didn't want another integration student, but here she is. She isn't as good as Jayme was. At least Jayme could do a very good physical and pap when she started with us. This girl is such a klutz with a speculum, I had to actually raise my voice at her and tell her to put the speculum down and let me do it. I would never let her touch me, or anyone I cared about. She just doesn't have the touch. I am really a possessive person, too, I hate sharing my patients. It is really hard for me to let go of that. One part of me thinks it's really nervey of her to think she should waltz in, never having met the patient, and I should let her do the delivery...Another part of me thinks I am really rude to not give her the opportunity to learn.

Well, it's too late tonight to worry about it. I need a serious attitude adjustment, but it ain't happenin' now.

How Old Do You Have To Be to Be Mature?

I was just wondering how old you have to be before you become mature? Consider: Adults who gossip, lie and decieve...just how mature is that behavior?
How is one supposed to react to that sort of behavior anyway? If you ignore it, you fall victim to the deceit, and suffer those consequences. If you take the information to those in charge, you are something of a tattle-tale. If you confront the offender, what then? What does it accomplish?
AAAAACK. I HATE drama. I really HATE it. It's enough to make me look for another job.
Speaking of which, I searched midwifejobs.com and found several things in western Mass. Hmmm, very interesting. I wonder what they'd offer if I sent a resume. Hmmm, maybe I'll see.

Welcome 2006

Where did 2005 go anyway?

It really flew by, didn't it? Le me try and review a bit. What have I done? Worked....slept....worked...didn't sleep....
My new partner at work, Pam, started delivering babies in February, so I got a tiny bit more sleep.
My back went out, and I have periodically argued with it ever since. I imagine that will continue indefinitely.
I had a few short vacations. Took a trip to Kansas, had a nice visit.
Ellie and Eunice came to visit over the summer, that was really nice. I introduced them to jewelry making, uh-oh. That turned out to be expensive, at least for Erik and Eunice...but wow, does she do AMAZING work. I think she needs to think about design as a profession.
I treated Mom to a trip to Mass and VA to see the kids over Thanksgiving. She had a great time, came home and sprained her ankle in the Ohare Airport. Oh My God.
Kids all came for Christmas. Awesome.
And me...I worked, slept, worked......

And how did 2006 start? I worked....Baby #1 was born at 2:06 a.m., "Aiden Patrick" 5 lbs, 12 oz., cord around the neck x 1 (that was for you Pam), meconium (pooped before birth), crummy heart tones that necessitated an (OH MY GOD,NO) an epis. But, all in all, apgars of 8 & 9 (good scores for those of you who don't understand anything I just said). Not the "New Year Baby" in Rockford--missed it by an hour. But the NYB at OSF, and for Cornerstone.

What will 2006 bring? Good things for everyone, I hope. 2005 was pretty rough for a lot of folks--Tsunami, hurricaines. Let's not do that again.

Sleepless in Rockford

Well, another baby is on the way. And it looks like I'll be up for the better part of the night. I wish the babies would be polite enough to come at a civilized hour. All of mine did. Every single one was born in the daylight. Hmpf.
I have delivered one girl already, and this one is going to be an all-nighter. Maybe I can sleep tomorrow. We shall see.
Someone did a study, to see if babies are born more at night than the day, and found they are evenly divided. Why does it feel like they are born more often in the night then? Just because they get your attention then?
I have no place to rest here. There's a DOCTOR in the Doctor's Lounge, which therefore precludes my presence in said lounge. After all, as the security folks are so happy to remind me, I am NOT a doctor. So, if I want to watch the monitor, I get to sit up at the Nurse's station all night. Or else I can go lie down in the NURSE'S lounge, because after all, I AM still a nurse.
Hmpf.

Tis the Season

Yesterday, in conversation, I confessed to my friend Pam that Christmas is just not my favorite holiday. I think it started when I was young, and my father died 3 days before Christmas. That just put a sad color on the holiday from that point on...It was better when my own children were young, since really, Christmas is a holiday for children, in my humble opinion. When I became a mother, I stopped caring if I ever saw another present with my own name on it, and wished only for their happiness. I still feel that way, except for the one thing I do love at the holidays, and that is to see all my children (Eunice too) in the same room at the same time. I confess it is quite an experience to have them all home. You never stop laughing.
So, I will drag out the Christmas tree and decorations, brave the cold to put up lights on the outdoor bushes, set up the Christmas candles (no open flame, however) and decorate the house. Because the kids will be home for Christmas, and that is really all that I ever want.